Anxiety: Truth or Excuse?

wSorry to start with such an accusing title, but as you will know if you have read any of my previous blogs, I unfortunately suffer from mental illness myself. And you know what? I wish I didn’t and would give anything to go back to work. 

Mental illness is one of those horrible things you can’t see, which makes it so much worse to deal with. I’ve had numerous physical injuries and illnesses over the years, and I could always look at myself and see the problem and in fairness try to deal with it. Don’t get me wrong, I would never criticise anyone with a physical disability – they are the bravest people around! I know I personally wouldn’t be strong enough to cope myself.

Anyway, back to my original gripe… Having listened to Psychiatrists, Psychologists and CPN’s all telling me to be patient, medication takes time to start working within your brain (…as you can probably gather I’m not a very patient person at all!) I like to know what’s the solution to things! When I know the solution, then I can progress and do something about it!!! I think that’s probably why this cynicism of a lot of people hits home personally, to such an extent. 

I honestly can’t criticise the NHS at all for all of the help they have given me over the last few years. I really do appreciate it. That said, what annoys me even more is that in this country there are way too many people playing the system, either for sympathy, or to play the benefits system. Let’s start with benefit fraud: We have all seen these people at some time or another, they seem to think they are being clever, making every excuse under the sun to either supplement their income or avoid working, either way it’s hurting those who are really suffering. It’s taking away trust for those who rightfully deserve it. I want to be “normal” and be able to work, I just mentally cannot cope with daily living let alone hold down a job. 

I understand why there are regular checks on people who claim any of the benefits regarding disability, unfortunately it seems to be solely down to the fraudulent claimers who seem to be believed over the genuine claimers. Personally I would say we have quite a good system in this country but my sympathies must go out to the employees who have to trawl through the claims to decide who is worthy and who isn’t. Like I have said, I suffer from a few mental issues, which if I’m honest make me feel worthless to society, and I certainly hate the fact I have to rely on these people for help, but the truth of the fact is I wouldn’t be able to function without their help, and for that i am very appreciative. 

Slightly off topic , again, I write this blog as a way to connect with people, as one of my issues is struggling to leave my house, for a number of reasons causing a lack of social interaction, so writing these is the only way of connecting. It helps me connect with people and say what I feel. Sorry making this about myself and that was never the intention and for that I apologise.

Anyway, back to topic… Anxiety or broadening it slightly, mental health in general: Depression, OCD or whatever you like to choose. There are so many people suffering for one reason or another, and my sympathies go out to them. And this is why it really grinds my gears when I hear frauds claiming Okay, they are struggling with, let’s use anxiety as an example, before my own problems I honestly would say I was quite a good judge of people? Hmmm, perhaps that was one of my strengths as a manager? Maybe, I don’t know. But since being diagnosed with severe anxiety myself, I find it so hard when people use it as an excuse for not doing things, ESPECIALLY when it comes to professional medical help! Whether it be not taking medication or not turning up for appointments, I would bet that anyone who suffers from anxiety, depression or other mental illness, at some time has thought this medication isn’t helping or I really don’t want to go for my appointment with their psychiatrist or other healthcare professional. But you know what? We show up in spite of everything.

This is where in personal experience flags come up… I decided to go cold turkey on my medication not so long back, thinking this isn’t helping, believe me it certainly was, and i would seriously think twice before doing it again. For those who say medication doesn’t was things, I would disagree. Stopping mine wasn’t the best choice i ever made, we can all look on Google or wherever and look at side effects for our medications and find reasons to stop taking them, but surely health professionals know these before they prescribe them to us?!

I only bring this up because I feel that there is so much medication wasted on people who are actually falsifying their illnesses for one reason or another, whether it be attention or financial. Where I live there are quite strict rules regarding appointments with medical professionals, for example missing appointments for a valid reason is acceptable on an odd occasion, but regularly missing appointments is not acceptable. Even though I struggle to leave the house, I always keep these appointments, perhaps that’s because I hate being how I am and the only way I see of getting out of this hole is by accepting their help. But people miss these appointments when waiting lists are so long as it is? I don’t understand that. Don’t be a dick.

Fortunately, I normally get plenty of notice when these appointments are planned, and I can plan my route, etc. to get there on time and make arrangements. Maybe that’s why I have no sympathy for anyone who uses their anxiety as an excuse not be helped. ATTEND YOUR APPOINTMENTS. Stop the excuses!!! To me, I think that’s a sure fire way of telling that they either don’t want help, or the whole thing is an attention seeking thing and they don’t need help in the first place! 

Sorry for the rant being so personal, but I’m sick of having to ask for help and being told to wait x amount of time, basically because there so many fake people out there wasting time and resources of mental health professionals and benefits organisations.

GET A FUCKING LIFE!!! I used to have one, and all I want is to try and have one again!

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